It’s tough being a parent of a teenager. Most find it hard to deal with turbulent teens. While teenagers come with their own “unreadable” signs, it is important to take deal with the issue calmly.
Issues, issues, issues
Ask Tara Srivatsan, the mother of a 14-year-old, “Children do not always understand the value of money. As a parent, I will fail to do my duty if I don’t tell my son what is right and wrong. This, even at the cost of sounding strict. Recently, my son insisted on buying Puma slippers worth over Rs 1,000. I was livid. He must understand the value of money. Tantrums cannot be given into at all times. Sometimes, a good shouting is all the kid needs.” Which might be the best way forward, but psychologists believe that making a child earn his money will also make him realise the importance of it.
Seeking the answers
How many times have we heard about these years being the “terrible” years. For Sowmya M., her 20-year-old is quite patient, thankfully. But when she looks back, she feels he could be defined as a rebel then. He was stubborn and angry all the time. “It was quite a challenging period,” she says. But such situations always prompt soul searching. “Either parent can be a ‘friend’. One has to be stricter so that there are boundaries. Having ‘conversations’ about issues is also equally important. Children feel that parents don’t understand their perspective,” explains Sowmya who does lay down the rule, “If the child disrespects elders, that is when parents have to be firm.”
Don’t be harsh
Babita Sharma, a homemaker reveals, “This is a phase everyone has been through. We need to be patient. In a conflict, I try not put my foot down and thrust opinions or even agree blindly. We usually come to a compromise where there is no room for grudges or frustration. I give my son all the space. It’s important for parents to remember not to embarrass children. Appreciate and acknowledge their qualities. That is all a teenager needs.” And psychologists agree to that. Anupama M, a finance professional adds, “I have a 13-year-old daughter. This is when they are discovering their personality. It is imperative that parents establish themselves as friends. Communication is the key.”
Issues, issues, issues
Ask Tara Srivatsan, the mother of a 14-year-old, “Children do not always understand the value of money. As a parent, I will fail to do my duty if I don’t tell my son what is right and wrong. This, even at the cost of sounding strict. Recently, my son insisted on buying Puma slippers worth over Rs 1,000. I was livid. He must understand the value of money. Tantrums cannot be given into at all times. Sometimes, a good shouting is all the kid needs.” Which might be the best way forward, but psychologists believe that making a child earn his money will also make him realise the importance of it.
Seeking the answers
How many times have we heard about these years being the “terrible” years. For Sowmya M., her 20-year-old is quite patient, thankfully. But when she looks back, she feels he could be defined as a rebel then. He was stubborn and angry all the time. “It was quite a challenging period,” she says. But such situations always prompt soul searching. “Either parent can be a ‘friend’. One has to be stricter so that there are boundaries. Having ‘conversations’ about issues is also equally important. Children feel that parents don’t understand their perspective,” explains Sowmya who does lay down the rule, “If the child disrespects elders, that is when parents have to be firm.”
Don’t be harsh
Babita Sharma, a homemaker reveals, “This is a phase everyone has been through. We need to be patient. In a conflict, I try not put my foot down and thrust opinions or even agree blindly. We usually come to a compromise where there is no room for grudges or frustration. I give my son all the space. It’s important for parents to remember not to embarrass children. Appreciate and acknowledge their qualities. That is all a teenager needs.” And psychologists agree to that. Anupama M, a finance professional adds, “I have a 13-year-old daughter. This is when they are discovering their personality. It is imperative that parents establish themselves as friends. Communication is the key.”
